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General InformationEdit

Title "The One with the Two Parties"
Format SubRip
Extension .srt

SubtitlesEdit

​1
00:00:06,774 --> 00:00:09,334
I'll get candles and
my mom's lace tablecloth.

2
00:00:09,610 --> 00:00:11,703
And since it's Rachel's birthday...

3
00:00:11,946 --> 00:00:14,141
...I thought I'd poach a salmon.

4
00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:15,846
What?

5
00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:20,180
Question. Why do we always
have parties where you poach things?

6
00:00:20,388 --> 00:00:21,878
You want to be on the food committee?

7
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:25,215
Question 2. Why do we always
have parties with committees?

8
00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:29,527
Why can't we just get pizza
and beer and have fun?

9
00:00:29,730 --> 00:00:33,791
I agree. Fancy parties are only fun
if you're fancy on the inside.

10
00:00:34,035 --> 00:00:35,696
And I'm not sure we are.

11
00:00:37,171 --> 00:00:39,401
You don't want it to be special?

12
00:00:39,707 --> 00:00:42,301
Fine. You can throw
any kind of party you want.

13
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:44,375
Joey, they're not real!

14
00:00:46,414 --> 00:00:49,577
I start miles beneath the surface
of these things. They're fake.

15
00:00:49,884 --> 00:00:51,374
See?
Honk, honk!

16
00:00:52,887 --> 00:00:56,050
Wow, it's like porno for clowns!

17
00:00:57,691 --> 00:00:59,716
The One With Two Parties

18
00:01:44,807 --> 00:01:47,640
Neither of Rachel's sisters can come.

19
00:01:47,876 --> 00:01:51,312
I still have to invite Dylan
and Emma and Shannon Cooper.

20
00:01:52,481 --> 00:01:53,709
No Shannon Cooper.

21
00:01:53,916 --> 00:01:55,178
Why not her?

22
00:01:55,484 --> 00:01:56,382
Because she....

23
00:01:56,585 --> 00:01:58,314
She steals stuff.

24
00:02:00,823 --> 00:02:05,760
Or maybe she doesn't and Joey slept
with her and never called her back.

25
00:02:07,696 --> 00:02:09,323
Joey, that is horrible.

26
00:02:09,531 --> 00:02:10,759
Hey, I liked her.

27
00:02:10,999 --> 00:02:12,330
Maybe too much.

28
00:02:12,568 --> 00:02:14,092
I don't know.

29
00:02:14,336 --> 00:02:16,566
I guess I just got scared.

30
00:02:17,706 --> 00:02:19,537
I'm sorry. I didn't know.

31
00:02:20,542 --> 00:02:23,272
I didn't think anyone
would buy that. Okay!

32
00:02:24,780 --> 00:02:26,213
Hi, honey.
How did it go?

33
00:02:26,415 --> 00:02:28,349
It was the graduation from hell.

34
00:02:28,584 --> 00:02:31,849
My cousin went to hell
on a football scholarship.

35
00:02:32,788 --> 00:02:35,086
It's supposed to be a joyous occasion.

36
00:02:35,357 --> 00:02:38,417
My sister would graduate from college.
Nobody thought she would.

37
00:02:38,894 --> 00:02:42,887
It's a testament to what a girl
from Long lsland will do for a Celica.

38
00:02:43,966 --> 00:02:44,864
What happened?

39
00:02:45,067 --> 00:02:46,227
My parents happened.

40
00:02:46,435 --> 00:02:49,404
All they had to do was sit
in the same stadium, smile...

41
00:02:49,638 --> 00:02:52,801
...and not talk about the divorce.
But no!

42
00:02:53,041 --> 00:02:55,601
They got into a fight
during the commencement address.

43
00:02:55,878 --> 00:02:59,871
Bishop Tutu actually
had to stop and shush them.

44
00:03:02,217 --> 00:03:03,582
You know the good news?

45
00:03:03,785 --> 00:03:06,447
I get to serve coffee
for the next eight hours.

46
00:03:08,557 --> 00:03:10,855
I guess we don't invite her parents.

47
00:03:11,059 --> 00:03:13,459
-How about just her mom?
-Why her mom?

48
00:03:13,929 --> 00:03:15,829
Because I already invited her.

49
00:03:16,431 --> 00:03:18,399
Did you ask Stacy Roth?

50
00:03:18,634 --> 00:03:19,896
Can't invite her.

51
00:03:22,804 --> 00:03:24,135
She also steals.

52
00:03:27,135 --> 00:03:30,135
So does her roomate.

53
00:03:37,579 --> 00:03:40,446
Here are the candles.
Where's the birthday cake?

54
00:03:40,682 --> 00:03:42,582
We're not having birthday cake.

55
00:03:42,851 --> 00:03:44,580
We're having birthday flan.

56
00:03:46,922 --> 00:03:47,889
Excuse me?

57
00:03:48,090 --> 00:03:50,024
It's a traditional
Mexican custard dessert.

58
00:03:50,259 --> 00:03:51,624
That's nice.

59
00:03:51,860 --> 00:03:54,556
Happy birthday, Rachel.
Here's some goo!

60
00:04:01,370 --> 00:04:02,735
Dr. Greene!

61
00:04:03,205 --> 00:04:05,036
Oh, my God!
It's Rachel's dad.

62
00:04:07,709 --> 00:04:08,971
Why are you here?

63
00:04:09,244 --> 00:04:11,940
The father can't see
the daughter on her birthday?

64
00:04:12,147 --> 00:04:13,944
No, no, the father can.

65
00:04:14,216 --> 00:04:17,947
But since I am the roommate,
I can tell you she's not here.

66
00:04:18,220 --> 00:04:21,246
And I'll pass along the message.
Okay? So bye-bye.

67
00:04:21,623 --> 00:04:23,386
You're having a party.

68
00:04:24,326 --> 00:04:26,317
No, no, not a party.

69
00:04:26,562 --> 00:04:29,656
Just a surprise gathering
of some people Rachel knows.

70
00:04:29,898 --> 00:04:33,595
-This is Phoebe, Chandler and Joey.
-I'll never remember all that.

71
00:04:34,136 --> 00:04:36,161
So what's the deal?

72
00:04:36,438 --> 00:04:40,067
Rachel comes home, people pop out
and yell stuff? Is that it?

73
00:04:40,309 --> 00:04:43,767
This isn't your first
surprise party, is it, sir?

74
00:04:46,682 --> 00:04:48,172
Hi, Monica.

75
00:04:51,286 --> 00:04:54,187
The Chinese menu guy.
Forgot the menus.

76
00:04:54,456 --> 00:04:57,118
So basically, just a Chinese guy.

77
00:04:58,827 --> 00:05:02,991
Dr. Greene, come with me.
We'll put your jacket on Rachel's bed.

78
00:05:05,701 --> 00:05:08,636
All right.
That sounds like a two-person job.

79
00:05:12,174 --> 00:05:14,472
Well, my goodness!
What was that?

80
00:05:14,710 --> 00:05:18,339
Sandra, I thought you were Rachel.
We weren't ready for you yet.

81
00:05:18,547 --> 00:05:22,313
-You thought I was Rachel?
-Yes, because you look so young.

82
00:05:22,551 --> 00:05:25,111
And because you're both,
you know, white women.

83
00:05:27,856 --> 00:05:32,020
Oh, I missed you kids.
Should I put my coat in the bedroom?

84
00:05:34,496 --> 00:05:37,624
-No, I'll take that for you.
-Oh, well, thank you.

85
00:05:37,866 --> 00:05:40,130
Such a gentleman.
Thank you.

86
00:05:43,205 --> 00:05:47,005
It all looks so nice.
So festive. All the balloons.

87
00:05:48,076 --> 00:05:51,568
Oh, the funniest thing happened
to me on the way here.

88
00:05:51,847 --> 00:05:54,315
-I was driving
-That's great!

89
00:05:57,552 --> 00:06:00,885
I can't wait to hear the rest,
but I have to go to the bathroom.

90
00:06:01,156 --> 00:06:02,817
Hey, come with me.

91
00:06:03,325 --> 00:06:05,555
-What?
-lt will be like we're gal pals.

92
00:06:05,827 --> 00:06:08,557
You know, like at a restaurant.
It'll be fun! Come on.

93
00:06:14,569 --> 00:06:16,366
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God!

94
00:06:16,605 --> 00:06:18,095
Think. Think.

95
00:06:18,340 --> 00:06:20,535
What would Jack and Chrissy do?

96
00:06:22,444 --> 00:06:25,880
Okay, now that your coat
is safely in the bed

97
00:06:26,114 --> 00:06:28,446
We can come back out
in the living room.

98
00:06:28,717 --> 00:06:33,017
Joey and Chandler, it's time
you take Dr. Greene over to your place.

99
00:06:33,221 --> 00:06:35,086
Yes, absolutely.

100
00:06:36,525 --> 00:06:37,355
Why, again?

101
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,228
Because that's where
the party is, you goon!

102
00:06:42,964 --> 00:06:46,798
-See, this is just the staging area.
-Right, it's the staging area.

103
00:06:47,069 --> 00:06:50,038
This is clearly
in the wrong apartment.

104
00:06:55,210 --> 00:06:58,771
All right, you guys are off
to party number one.

105
00:07:00,215 --> 00:07:01,876
And you....

106
00:07:02,117 --> 00:07:04,551
You are off to party number two.

107
00:07:05,153 --> 00:07:08,281
All right, let's keep it moving,
let's keep it moving.

108
00:07:10,592 --> 00:07:13,083
At least send some women to my party.

109
00:07:15,330 --> 00:07:17,298
Okay, that's Ross. All right.

110
00:07:18,333 --> 00:07:19,800
Okay, they're coming.

111
00:07:27,008 --> 00:07:29,306
Thank you for such a wonderful dinner.

112
00:07:29,911 --> 00:07:31,742
Thanks for being born.

113
00:07:31,980 --> 00:07:35,040
Thank you for my beautiful earrings.
They're perfect.

114
00:07:35,250 --> 00:07:36,410
I love you.

115
00:07:37,252 --> 00:07:40,346
Now, you can exchange them
if you want, okay?

116
00:07:41,089 --> 00:07:43,148
Now I love you even more.

117
00:07:48,663 --> 00:07:49,595
Surprise!

118
00:07:50,432 --> 00:07:51,922
Oh, my gosh!

119
00:07:52,167 --> 00:07:53,031
Wow!

120
00:07:54,269 --> 00:07:55,930
Oh, my God. Mom!

121
00:07:56,138 --> 00:07:57,435
This is so great!

122
00:07:57,839 --> 00:07:59,830
Happy birthday, sweetie.

123
00:08:01,443 --> 00:08:04,071
You! I had no idea!

124
00:08:04,279 --> 00:08:05,473
-Really?
-No, I knew.

125
00:08:05,714 --> 00:08:06,874
All right.

126
00:08:07,983 --> 00:08:10,281
There's food and drinks on the table.

127
00:08:10,552 --> 00:08:13,146
Go across the hall.
Right now, Joey and Chandler's.

128
00:08:13,388 --> 00:08:14,650
-Why?
-Just go.

129
00:08:17,325 --> 00:08:18,314
Weird.

130
00:08:18,527 --> 00:08:19,516
Surprise!

131
00:08:23,165 --> 00:08:25,292
Happy birthday, sweet pea.

132
00:08:25,534 --> 00:08:26,626
Daddy!

133
00:08:34,607 --> 00:08:37,576
Both of them are here? Both of them?
Both of them are here?

134
00:08:37,843 --> 00:08:40,175
Well, we could count again?

135
00:08:40,913 --> 00:08:42,244
I can't believe this!

136
00:08:42,448 --> 00:08:44,006
You know, this is ridiculous.

137
00:08:44,250 --> 00:08:46,514
This is your birthday, your party.

138
00:08:46,719 --> 00:08:49,916
Let's put them together.
If they can't deal with it, who cares?

139
00:08:50,122 --> 00:08:52,181
-I do.
-That's who.

140
00:08:54,093 --> 00:08:55,424
Are you gonna be okay?

141
00:08:55,628 --> 00:08:59,462
I don't really have a choice.
I can look at the bright side.

142
00:08:59,698 --> 00:09:02,565
I get two birthday parties
and two birthday cakes.

143
00:09:02,801 --> 00:09:04,029
Well, actually...

144
00:09:04,603 --> 00:09:06,730
...just one birthday flan.

145
00:09:09,875 --> 00:09:12,605
It's a traditional
Mexican custard dessert.

146
00:09:12,878 --> 00:09:15,438
Talk to Monica.
She's on the food committee.

147
00:09:22,288 --> 00:09:25,815
Some girl just walked up to me
and said, "I want you, Dennis"...

148
00:09:26,058 --> 00:09:28,458
...and stuck her tongue
down my throat.

149
00:09:28,894 --> 00:09:30,122
I love this party!

150
00:09:31,330 --> 00:09:33,423
-Quick volleyball question.
-Volleyball.

151
00:09:33,666 --> 00:09:35,634
We set up a court in your room.

152
00:09:35,834 --> 00:09:38,302
You didn't like
that gray lamp, did you?

153
00:09:39,438 --> 00:09:43,636
A woman stuck her tongue down my throat.
I'm not even listening to you.

154
00:09:44,109 --> 00:09:46,805
-Dennis!
-Okay, that's me.

155
00:09:48,247 --> 00:09:52,183
Can you keep Dad occupied?
I'm gonna talk to Mom for a while.

156
00:09:52,451 --> 00:09:54,942
Do you have any ideas
for any openers?

157
00:09:55,788 --> 00:09:58,848
Stay clear of "I'm the guy
that's doing your daughter"...

158
00:09:59,124 --> 00:10:01,115
...and you should be okay.

159
00:10:03,329 --> 00:10:05,320
I want you to take a piece of paper

160
00:10:05,531 --> 00:10:09,490
Here you go. And write down
your most embarrassing memory.

161
00:10:10,002 --> 00:10:14,496
When you're not using the markers,
put the caps back on them...

162
00:10:14,707 --> 00:10:16,766
... because they will dry out.

163
00:10:17,710 --> 00:10:19,109
Hi, Dr. Greene.

164
00:10:20,846 --> 00:10:23,178
So how's everything in the...

165
00:10:23,882 --> 00:10:25,850
...vascular surgery...

166
00:10:26,352 --> 00:10:27,182
...game?

167
00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:31,978
It's not a game, Ross.
A woman died on my table today.

168
00:10:32,558 --> 00:10:33,820
I'm sorry.

169
00:10:35,861 --> 00:10:38,056
That's the good thing about my job.

170
00:10:38,297 --> 00:10:41,562
All the dinosaurs on my table
are already dead.

171
00:10:44,203 --> 00:10:46,831
Listen, I don't mean
to be a pain about this...

172
00:10:47,039 --> 00:10:50,167
... but I've noticed some of you
are just placing them on.

173
00:10:50,376 --> 00:10:52,241
You want to push the caps...

174
00:10:54,179 --> 00:10:56,238
... until you hear them click.

175
00:10:58,017 --> 00:10:58,847
Gunther!

176
00:10:59,051 --> 00:11:00,018
Where you going?

177
00:11:00,219 --> 00:11:02,881
I was sort of thinking about maybe

178
00:11:03,155 --> 00:11:06,147
No! No, you can't go!
No, this is fun.

179
00:11:06,425 --> 00:11:08,893
We're just starting.
Here's your marker.

180
00:11:12,164 --> 00:11:14,894
If you want to go, just go.

181
00:11:15,167 --> 00:11:17,067
She'll yell at me again.

182
00:11:20,439 --> 00:11:22,270
All right, I can get you out.

183
00:11:22,508 --> 00:11:23,566
What?

184
00:11:25,277 --> 00:11:27,768
In a minute, I'll create a diversion.

185
00:11:28,013 --> 00:11:31,676
When I do, walk quickly to the door
and don't look back.

186
00:11:32,718 --> 00:11:35,687
-I think I need a drink.
-I'll get it for you.

187
00:11:35,921 --> 00:11:37,912
-What do you want?
-Scotch.

188
00:11:38,123 --> 00:11:42,457
I'll be back in 10 seconds with
your scotch on the rocks in a glass.

189
00:11:42,761 --> 00:11:43,591
Neat!

190
00:11:44,263 --> 00:11:45,252
Cool.

191
00:11:46,298 --> 00:11:49,131
Neat, as in no rocks.

192
00:11:50,002 --> 00:11:50,900
I know.

193
00:11:54,907 --> 00:11:58,308
Hello, Ross!
Where have you been?

194
00:11:59,011 --> 00:12:01,878
I have been in the bathroom.

195
00:12:02,915 --> 00:12:05,406
Stay clear of the salmon mousse.

196
00:12:09,888 --> 00:12:11,549
Scotch neat.

197
00:12:11,990 --> 00:12:14,083
That's Rachel's father's drink.

198
00:12:16,095 --> 00:12:18,529
Mine too. Isn't that neat?

199
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:21,059
Scotch neat.

200
00:12:23,736 --> 00:12:25,829
Would you excuse me?

201
00:12:31,910 --> 00:12:34,572
Where are you sneaking off to, mister?

202
00:12:35,581 --> 00:12:37,208
I'm getting my cigarettes.

203
00:12:37,416 --> 00:12:38,348
No.

204
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:39,915
What do you mean "no"?

205
00:12:40,586 --> 00:12:42,850
See, because that's the staging area.

206
00:12:43,122 --> 00:12:46,683
You go in there, it'll ruin
the whole illusion of the party.

207
00:12:47,793 --> 00:12:49,852
Take your scotch back in there...

208
00:12:50,062 --> 00:12:53,395
...and I will get
your cigarettes for you, sir.

209
00:12:53,766 --> 00:12:56,860
-Get my glasses too.
-All righty-roo.

210
00:13:00,439 --> 00:13:03,567
What a great moment to say that
for the first time.

211
00:13:06,879 --> 00:13:11,248
Okay, the first person's
most embarrassing memory is...

212
00:13:11,483 --> 00:13:13,542
... "Monica, your party sucks."

213
00:13:14,653 --> 00:13:15,950
Very funny.

214
00:13:16,622 --> 00:13:19,921
Oh, no! Did someone forget
to use a coaster?

215
00:13:20,125 --> 00:13:21,285
What?

216
00:13:28,467 --> 00:13:29,934
I don't see anything.

217
00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:33,397
Great, I'm seeing water rings again.

218
00:13:36,408 --> 00:13:38,808
Ross, whose glasses are those?

219
00:13:39,745 --> 00:13:40,803
Mine.

220
00:13:42,581 --> 00:13:44,105
You wear bifocals?

221
00:13:46,185 --> 00:13:49,245
I have a condition apparently...

222
00:13:49,454 --> 00:13:51,319
...that I require...

223
00:13:52,791 --> 00:13:55,089
...two different sets of focals.

224
00:13:56,128 --> 00:13:59,529
Do you know my husband
has glasses just like that?

225
00:13:59,765 --> 00:14:02,427
Well, those are very popular frames.

226
00:14:02,701 --> 00:14:04,794
Neil Sedaka wears them.

227
00:14:07,773 --> 00:14:10,264
I hear you can get people out of here.

228
00:14:14,346 --> 00:14:17,543
You didn't tell me
your boyfriend smokes.

229
00:14:17,783 --> 00:14:19,182
Yeah, like a chimney.

230
00:14:20,953 --> 00:14:22,113
Big smoker.

231
00:14:23,722 --> 00:14:25,485
Big, big smoker.

232
00:14:25,791 --> 00:14:29,693
In fact, I'm gonna go into the hallway
and fire up this bad boy.

233
00:14:43,542 --> 00:14:45,066
Are you wearing my glasses?

234
00:14:46,578 --> 00:14:47,545
Yes.

235
00:14:50,215 --> 00:14:54,083
I was just warming up
the earpieces for you.

236
00:14:55,020 --> 00:14:55,987
Thank you.

237
00:14:58,590 --> 00:15:00,558
Is that one of my cigarettes?

238
00:15:07,099 --> 00:15:11,001
Yes, it is. I was just
moistening the tip.

239
00:15:12,938 --> 00:15:16,339
She's taking the trash out,
so I can get you out of here.

240
00:15:16,608 --> 00:15:18,940
But it has to be now.
She'll be back any minute.

241
00:15:19,211 --> 00:15:20,109
What about my friend?

242
00:15:20,345 --> 00:15:23,872
Only the three of you.
Any more and she'll get suspicious.

243
00:15:24,082 --> 00:15:26,676
-Let me just get my coat.
-There isn't time!

244
00:15:29,121 --> 00:15:30,588
Just leave everything.

245
00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:33,354
They'll take care of you next door.

246
00:15:33,926 --> 00:15:35,757
Is it true they have beer?

247
00:15:37,029 --> 00:15:39,361
Everything you've heard is true.

248
00:15:40,232 --> 00:15:42,598
Could you guys please keep it down?

249
00:15:42,801 --> 00:15:45,599
We're trying to start
a Boggle tournament.

250
00:15:45,599 --> 00:15:50,599
True, if these people find out a funny game,
then will be no people left in our party.

251
00:15:56,442 --> 00:15:57,272
You!

252
00:15:57,510 --> 00:15:58,602
And you.

253
00:15:58,845 --> 00:16:00,745
You're supposed to be at my party.

254
00:16:01,014 --> 00:16:02,845
And Gunther!

255
00:16:07,453 --> 00:16:09,080
What are you doing here?

256
00:16:12,992 --> 00:16:14,687
Welcome to the fo

257
00:16:18,831 --> 00:16:21,766
All right, I'm sorry.
But these people needed me.

258
00:16:21,968 --> 00:16:24,266
They work hard all week.
It's Saturday night.

259
00:16:24,470 --> 00:16:26,700
They deserve to have a little fun.
Go!

260
00:16:27,940 --> 00:16:29,703
You know, my party is fun.

261
00:16:29,976 --> 00:16:32,604
It's a little quieter,
less obvious sort of fun.

262
00:16:32,812 --> 00:16:35,940
But if people would just
give it a chance, it's

263
00:16:40,219 --> 00:16:44,781
-You want me to see a therapist?
-Sweetheart, you have a problem.

264
00:16:44,991 --> 00:16:48,654
You've chosen a boyfriend
exactly like your father.

265
00:16:49,529 --> 00:16:51,861
Okay, Mom, I'll make an appointment.

266
00:16:52,131 --> 00:16:55,328
But right now, I gotta go.
I gotta go do a thing.

267
00:16:55,535 --> 00:17:00,404
Did you know your mother
spent $1200 on bonsai trees?

268
00:17:00,807 --> 00:17:02,536
I felt like Gulliver.

269
00:17:03,576 --> 00:17:06,409
Daddy, I really want
to hear more about this...

270
00:17:06,679 --> 00:17:09,842
...but I just have to do some stuff.

271
00:17:10,049 --> 00:17:13,041
You work and you work
and you work at a marriage...

272
00:17:13,252 --> 00:17:15,652
... but all he cares about
is his stupid boat.

273
00:17:15,922 --> 00:17:18,686
You work and you work
and you work on a boat.

274
00:17:18,925 --> 00:17:21,826
He always ridiculed my pottery classes.

275
00:17:22,061 --> 00:17:23,995
And you sand it and varnish it.

276
00:17:24,230 --> 00:17:27,859
But when all is said and done,
he still drinks out of the mugs.

277
00:17:28,067 --> 00:17:31,059
One night of her yoga
and Bridges of Madison County....

278
00:17:31,337 --> 00:17:34,101
-The scotch, the cigarettes....
- The bonsais and the Chihuahua....

279
00:17:34,340 --> 00:17:36,604
I may have only been in therapy
for three weeks now but

280
00:17:36,876 --> 00:17:39,344
What the hell does she want
with half a boat?

281
00:17:43,216 --> 00:17:46,743
Okay, okay, you can be shirts
and I'll be skins.

282
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,551
I'll be skins!

283
00:17:56,295 --> 00:17:58,559
How you holding up there, big tiger?

284
00:18:00,266 --> 00:18:04,134
Sorry. When my parents were getting
divorced, I got a lot of "tigers."

285
00:18:04,971 --> 00:18:08,407
I got a lot of "champs,"
"chiefs," "sports."

286
00:18:08,741 --> 00:18:09,935
I even got a "governor."

287
00:18:12,478 --> 00:18:15,879
This is it, isn't it?
This is what my life will be like.

288
00:18:16,249 --> 00:18:18,308
My mom there, my dad there.

289
00:18:18,618 --> 00:18:21,109
Thanksgiving, Christmas.

290
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:25,916
She gets the house, he's in a condo
my sister will decorate with wicker.

291
00:18:26,726 --> 00:18:28,956
How did you get through this?

292
00:18:31,130 --> 00:18:34,065
I relied on a carefully
regimented program...

293
00:18:34,300 --> 00:18:35,824
...of denial...

294
00:18:36,769 --> 00:18:38,634
...and wetting the bed.

295
00:18:41,474 --> 00:18:43,806
You know, I just
It's so weird.

296
00:18:44,076 --> 00:18:48,740
I mean, I was in there just listening
to them bitch about each other.

297
00:18:48,948 --> 00:18:51,746
All I kept thinking about
was the Fourth of July.

298
00:18:53,352 --> 00:18:55,286
Because it reminded you of the way...

299
00:18:55,488 --> 00:18:58,184
...our forefathers used
to bitch at each other?

300
00:18:59,091 --> 00:19:01,753
It's just this thing.
Every year we would...

301
00:19:01,994 --> 00:19:04,758
...go out on my dad's boat
and watch the fireworks.

302
00:19:05,298 --> 00:19:09,325
Mom always hated it because
the ocean air made her hair all big.

303
00:19:09,535 --> 00:19:12,698
My sister Jill would be
throwing up over the side...

304
00:19:13,039 --> 00:19:15,701
...and Dad would be upset
because nobody helping.

305
00:19:15,975 --> 00:19:19,103
And when we did help, he'd scream
at us for doing it wrong.

306
00:19:22,315 --> 00:19:26,513
But then when the fireworks started,
everybody just shut up.

307
00:19:27,053 --> 00:19:29,317
You know, and it'd get really cold.

308
00:19:29,555 --> 00:19:33,184
And we'd all just sort of
smoosh under this one blanket.

309
00:19:33,459 --> 00:19:36,553
It never occurred to anybody
to bring another one.

310
00:19:38,297 --> 00:19:39,730
And now it's....

311
00:19:43,469 --> 00:19:44,868
Yeah, I know.

312
00:20:08,194 --> 00:20:10,185
Thanks for coming.
I hope you had fun.

313
00:20:10,596 --> 00:20:12,587
All right, I'm hitting the road.

314
00:20:12,832 --> 00:20:15,733
Now, I've left my 10 verbs
on the table.

315
00:20:15,935 --> 00:20:18,233
Be sure and send me
that finished poem.

316
00:20:18,504 --> 00:20:20,369
Okay, will do. Glad you came.

317
00:20:20,673 --> 00:20:23,733
-I think I saw Rachel out in the hall.
-Let me go check.

318
00:20:26,445 --> 00:20:28,379
Your mom wants to say goodbye.

319
00:20:28,681 --> 00:20:30,615
Happy birthday, sweetie.

320
00:20:33,853 --> 00:20:34,877
You drive safe.

321
00:20:36,689 --> 00:20:38,054
What are you doing?

322
00:20:39,425 --> 00:20:42,792
I'm getting ready
for the water skiing.

323
00:20:43,029 --> 00:20:45,293
Okay, big hug. One more.
Come on!

324
00:20:48,301 --> 00:20:49,427
How are you?

325
00:20:51,871 --> 00:20:53,805
-Where are you going?
-To get my coat.

326
00:20:54,073 --> 00:20:55,472
We'll get that for you.

327
00:20:55,741 --> 00:20:58,710
All right, all right.
I can get my own coat.

328
00:21:06,485 --> 00:21:09,079
Sorry, we're on a major flan high.

329
00:21:11,791 --> 00:21:14,555
Oh, no. No, you're not
supposed to be here.

330
00:21:14,794 --> 00:21:18,127
This is the staging area.
It's all wrong. You should leave.

331
00:21:18,831 --> 00:21:21,163
You know, just get out.

332
00:21:30,076 --> 00:21:32,340
Or perhaps you'd like
a creme de menthe.

333
00:21:33,913 --> 00:21:36,006
I have to be heading
toward my chateau.

334
00:21:36,282 --> 00:21:39,080
I guess we're going back
into the hallway again.

335
00:21:39,318 --> 00:21:41,286
Thanks for coming, Mrs. Greene.

336
00:21:54,100 --> 00:21:55,590
You take care.

337
00:21:59,138 --> 00:22:00,765
Oh, you kids.

338
00:22:03,642 --> 00:22:04,506
Well.

339
00:22:06,212 --> 00:22:09,340
This is the best party
I've been to in years.

340
00:22:10,316 --> 00:22:11,476
Thank you!

341
00:22:17,323 --> 00:22:19,484
Okay, everybody,
it's time for flan!

342
00:22:19,725 --> 00:22:23,058
Yep! Get ready
for the gelatinous fun.

343
00:22:24,063 --> 00:22:27,430
Looks like that stuff you get
when you get an infection.

344
00:22:27,666 --> 00:22:29,429
Okay, that's enough.

345
00:22:29,668 --> 00:22:32,432
Okay, Rachel,
make a special flan wish.

346
00:22:33,739 --> 00:22:35,331
Okay, I've got one.

347
00:22:39,645 --> 00:22:40,771
Heads up!

348
00:22:42,782 --> 00:22:45,842
Wow! Those things almost
never come true.