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General InformationEdit

Title "The One with the Baby on the Bus"
Format SubRip
Extension .srt

SubtitlesEdit

1
00:00:02,202 --> 00:00:04,033
Who the winny-binny boy?

2
00:00:04,905 --> 00:00:09,035
You the winny-winny-binny-binny boy!

3
00:00:10,711 --> 00:00:12,736
Don't cry.

4
00:00:12,946 --> 00:00:15,039
Don't cry.

5
00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:19,082
Why is he still crying?

6
00:00:19,082 --> 00:00:24,082
Don't worry. Nothing can't be solved by happy keys.

7
00:00:24,082 --> 00:00:29,082
yeah, I was feel much better when someone shaked Jacks medal in my face.

8
00:00:31,319 --> 00:00:33,378
Let me hold him for a sec.

9
00:00:33,588 --> 00:00:34,953
Here we go.

10
00:00:36,291 --> 00:00:37,155
There we are.

11
00:00:38,994 --> 00:00:40,120
Maybe it's me.

12
00:00:40,462 --> 00:00:44,330
Don't be silly. Ben loves you.
He's just being Mr. Cranky Pants.

13
00:00:44,633 --> 00:00:47,261
You know, I once dated
a Miss Cranky Pants.

14
00:00:48,470 --> 00:00:50,995
Lovely girl. Kind of moody.

15
00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:53,637
There we go, all better.

16
00:00:54,242 --> 00:00:56,233
There's my little boy.

17
00:01:02,684 --> 00:01:04,982
Can I see something?

18
00:01:18,767 --> 00:01:19,665
Cool!

19
00:01:19,868 --> 00:01:22,393
He hates me.
My nephew hates me!

20
00:01:22,393 --> 00:01:24,604
I'm unemployed, and my nephew hates me!

21
00:01:24,604 --> 00:01:27,866
Stop, don't do this. You are just unemployed.

22
00:01:30,105 --> 00:01:32,801
What if my own baby hates me?
What do I do then?

23
00:01:33,008 --> 00:01:34,532
Monica, stop! This is nuts.

24
00:01:34,843 --> 00:01:38,779
Do you know how long it'll be
before you have to deal with this problem?

25
00:01:39,648 --> 00:01:42,276
You don't even have a boyfriend yet.

26
00:01:44,620 --> 00:01:46,850
Joey, she does not look fat.

27
00:01:48,057 --> 00:01:50,116
The One With the Baby on the Bus

28
00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:34,836
Here you go.

29
00:02:39,376 --> 00:02:41,241
Goo, goo, goo!

30
00:02:44,447 --> 00:02:47,348
That is so funny!
Let me see that a sec.

31
00:02:54,958 --> 00:02:55,788
You okay?

32
00:02:56,026 --> 00:02:57,288
I don't know.

33
00:02:59,462 --> 00:03:01,020
What's in this pie?

34
00:03:01,231 --> 00:03:04,928
I don't know. Butter and eggs
and flour and lime and kiwi

35
00:03:05,135 --> 00:03:07,296
Kiwi? Kiwi?!

36
00:03:08,038 --> 00:03:09,471
You said it was a key lime pie.

37
00:03:09,706 --> 00:03:13,608
No, I didn't. I said kiwi lime.
That's what makes it so special.

38
00:03:13,877 --> 00:03:15,868
That's what's gonna kill me.

39
00:03:17,814 --> 00:03:19,145
I'm allergic to kiwi.

40
00:03:19,716 --> 00:03:23,379
No, you're not. You're allergic
to lobster and peanuts and

41
00:03:25,622 --> 00:03:26,884
Oh, my God!

42
00:03:27,090 --> 00:03:28,887
It's definitely getting worse.

43
00:03:29,726 --> 00:03:31,318
Is your tongue swelling up?

44
00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:34,423
Either that or my mouth
is getting smaller!

45
00:03:35,231 --> 00:03:37,426
Get your coat.
We're going to the hospital.

46
00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:39,898
-Will he be okay?
-He's gotta get a shot.

47
00:03:40,103 --> 00:03:43,470
You know, actually,
it's getting better. It is.

48
00:03:43,673 --> 00:03:46,073
Let's not go.
Anyone up for Scrabble?

49
00:03:47,243 --> 00:03:49,006
Jacket, now!

50
00:03:49,446 --> 00:03:52,677
What about Ben? We can't
bring a baby to the hospital.

51
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,110
We'll watch him.

52
00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:57,009
I don't think so.

53
00:03:58,288 --> 00:04:02,588
I have seven Catholic sisters.
I've taken care of hundreds of kids.

54
00:04:03,093 --> 00:04:05,027
Come on, we want to do it.
Don't we?

55
00:04:05,261 --> 00:04:07,354
I was gonna play basketball...

56
00:04:07,597 --> 00:04:09,497
... but I guess that's out the window.

57
00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:13,794
If you take him out for a walk,
remember to bring his hat.

58
00:04:14,003 --> 00:04:16,801
There's milk in the refrigerator
and diapers in the bag.

59
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,473
Hat, milk....

60
00:04:18,675 --> 00:04:19,505
Got it!

61
00:04:29,052 --> 00:04:30,451
Consider it done!

62
00:04:30,954 --> 00:04:31,784
You understood?

63
00:04:32,021 --> 00:04:34,888
My uncle Sal has a really big tongue.

64
00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:39,055
Is he the one
with the beautiful wife?

65
00:04:45,101 --> 00:04:48,537
You want to hear the song
I'm singing this afternoon?

66
00:04:48,772 --> 00:04:51,297
I wrote it this morning in the shower.

67
00:04:53,610 --> 00:04:58,070
I'm in the shower
And I'm writing a song

68
00:04:58,648 --> 00:05:02,379
Stop me if you've heard it

69
00:05:04,754 --> 00:05:08,554
My skin is soapy and my hair is wet

70
00:05:08,792 --> 00:05:12,956
And Tegrin spelled backward is nirget

71
00:05:16,766 --> 00:05:20,896
Rachel, sweetheart,
could I see you for a minute?

72
00:05:24,674 --> 00:05:25,902
What's up?

73
00:05:26,476 --> 00:05:28,171
F Y I:

74
00:05:28,445 --> 00:05:32,643
I've decided to pay a professional
musician to play here on Sundays.

75
00:05:32,849 --> 00:05:36,979
Her name is Stephanie something.
She's supposed to be very good.

76
00:05:37,187 --> 00:05:39,246
But what about Phoebe?

77
00:05:40,190 --> 00:05:42,988
It's not that your friend is bad.

78
00:05:43,827 --> 00:05:45,920
It's that she's so bad...

79
00:05:47,497 --> 00:05:52,196
...she makes me want to put my finger
through my eye into my brain...

80
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:54,096
...and swirl it around.

81
00:05:56,172 --> 00:05:58,606
Okay, so you're not a fan.

82
00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:02,377
But, I mean, come on.
You cannot do this to her.

83
00:06:06,382 --> 00:06:07,872
I have to do this to her?

84
00:06:08,151 --> 00:06:10,210
Lather, rinse, repeat

85
00:06:10,453 --> 00:06:12,648
And lather, rinse, repeat

86
00:06:12,856 --> 00:06:16,348
And lather, rinse, repeat

87
00:06:16,559 --> 00:06:18,288
As needed

88
00:06:25,001 --> 00:06:26,628
We didn't bring enough stuff.

89
00:06:27,336 --> 00:06:29,861
Did you forget to pack
the baby's anvil?

90
00:06:30,072 --> 00:06:31,972
I'm telling you, it'll be worth it.

91
00:06:32,575 --> 00:06:35,043
It's a known fact
that women love babies.

92
00:06:35,244 --> 00:06:38,907
Women love guys who love babies.
It's the sensitive thing.

93
00:06:39,915 --> 00:06:43,749
Aim him at that pack of babes.
Maybe one of them will break away.

94
00:06:44,420 --> 00:06:47,719
Wait, forget them.
We got one. Hard left.

95
00:06:47,990 --> 00:06:49,821
-Give me the baby.
-No, I got him.

96
00:06:50,059 --> 00:06:51,219
Come on, seriously.

97
00:06:51,427 --> 00:06:53,361
Oh, seriously, you want him?

98
00:06:58,034 --> 00:06:59,592
Who is this little cutie-pie?

99
00:07:00,069 --> 00:07:02,731
Well, don't think me immodest, but...

100
00:07:02,938 --> 00:07:04,405
... me.

101
00:07:05,841 --> 00:07:06,773
Want to smell him?

102
00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:09,102
I assume we're talking about the baby?

103
00:07:11,781 --> 00:07:15,080
He's got that great baby smell.
Get a whiff of his head.

104
00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:19,184
My uterus just skipped a beat.

105
00:07:20,423 --> 00:07:21,583
What'd I tell you?

106
00:07:21,857 --> 00:07:23,347
It's great you're doing this.

107
00:07:23,759 --> 00:07:25,727
Well, we are great guys.

108
00:07:25,961 --> 00:07:29,055
My brother and his boyfriend
have been trying to adopt.

109
00:07:29,298 --> 00:07:31,732
What agency did you two go through?

110
00:07:36,372 --> 00:07:37,930
But this is my gig.

111
00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:39,607
This is where I play.

112
00:07:39,809 --> 00:07:42,300
My name is written out there in chalk.

113
00:07:42,545 --> 00:07:45,275
You know, you can't just erase chalk.

114
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:49,878
Honey, I'm sorry.

115
00:07:50,152 --> 00:07:52,416
And he's going to
be paying this woman?

116
00:07:52,621 --> 00:07:55,488
Why doesn't he just give her
a throne and a crown?

117
00:07:55,758 --> 00:08:00,695
And, like, a gold stick
with a ball on top?

118
00:08:01,564 --> 00:08:05,125
Terry is a jerk! That's why
we always say, "Terry's a jerk!"

119
00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:07,801
That's where that came from.

120
00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:13,064
You probably did everything you could.

121
00:08:14,310 --> 00:08:18,269
You know what? Let me just
see what else I could do.

122
00:08:21,117 --> 00:08:24,086
Just let her go on after
Stephanie whatever her name is.

123
00:08:24,320 --> 00:08:26,652
You won't be here.
You don't pay her.

124
00:08:27,256 --> 00:08:28,518
I don't know.

125
00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:30,623
I'll clean the cappuccino machine!

126
00:08:30,826 --> 00:08:33,192
You don't clean
the cappuccino machine?

127
00:08:34,830 --> 00:08:37,628
Of course I clean it.

128
00:08:37,867 --> 00:08:40,597
I mean, I will clean it.

129
00:08:40,803 --> 00:08:42,361
I mean, I will clean it.

130
00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:45,506
All right, fine, fine, fine!

131
00:08:50,513 --> 00:08:51,878
-Done.
-Really?

132
00:08:52,114 --> 00:08:53,638
Who's working for you, babe?

133
00:08:54,350 --> 00:08:58,980
Oh, my God! This is so exciting!
How much am I gonna get?

134
00:08:59,188 --> 00:09:00,212
What?

135
00:09:00,990 --> 00:09:03,288
He's paying the people
who were playing.

136
00:09:04,326 --> 00:09:09,229
I meant, he's paying that other woman
because she's a professional.

137
00:09:09,698 --> 00:09:12,633
I'm not gonna be the only one
who's not getting paid.

138
00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:15,633
I'm sorry, no!

139
00:09:16,038 --> 00:09:20,372
No, I'm not some sloppy second,
you know, charity band.

140
00:09:20,576 --> 00:09:23,067
There are thousands of places
in this city...

141
00:09:23,345 --> 00:09:26,041
...where people would pay
to hear me play.

142
00:09:26,248 --> 00:09:28,182
When I play, I play for me

143
00:09:28,384 --> 00:09:30,409
I don't need your charity

144
00:09:30,653 --> 00:09:32,086
Thank you!

145
00:09:40,262 --> 00:09:43,595
I'm not getting a shot.
Maybe they can take the needle...

146
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:47,496
...and squirt it into my mouth.
Like a squirt gun.

147
00:09:53,103 --> 00:09:55,401
Hello there. I'm Dr. Carlin.

148
00:09:55,906 --> 00:09:59,569
I see someone's having
a little allergic reaction.

149
00:09:59,844 --> 00:10:02,278
Doctor, can I see you
for just a moment?

150
00:10:04,415 --> 00:10:08,181
My brother has
a slight phobia about needles.

151
00:10:08,419 --> 00:10:11,252
Did you tell him
about my squirt gun idea?

152
00:10:12,890 --> 00:10:15,256
My brother, the Ph.D.,
would like to know...

153
00:10:15,459 --> 00:10:18,121
...if there's any way
to treat this orally?

154
00:10:18,929 --> 00:10:23,229
Under these circumstances, it has to be
an injection, and it has to be now.

155
00:10:24,235 --> 00:10:25,429
So?

156
00:10:28,038 --> 00:10:31,769
Go and have a seat. The doctor
says it's got to be a needle.

157
00:10:31,976 --> 00:10:36,743
You're just going to have to be brave.
Can you do that for me?

158
00:10:39,817 --> 00:10:42,786
Oh, boy! You are doing so good.

159
00:10:44,555 --> 00:10:46,489
You want to squeeze my hand?

160
00:10:47,424 --> 00:10:49,449
Ross, don't squeeze it so hard.

161
00:10:49,660 --> 00:10:52,185
Honey, really.
Don't squeeze it so hard!

162
00:10:52,396 --> 00:10:54,159
Let go of my hand!

163
00:10:57,768 --> 00:11:00,259
Good plan. Next time
we want to pick up women...

164
00:11:00,504 --> 00:11:02,972
...we should go to
the park and make out.

165
00:11:03,474 --> 00:11:04,998
Taxi! Taxi!

166
00:11:07,244 --> 00:11:08,506
Look at that talent.

167
00:11:11,949 --> 00:11:14,008
Just practicing. You're good.

168
00:11:14,251 --> 00:11:15,479
Carry on.

169
00:11:16,186 --> 00:11:17,778
Wait, wait, wait!

170
00:11:18,422 --> 00:11:21,585
Hey, you. He's just adorable.

171
00:11:21,792 --> 00:11:26,024
Can you tell him that?
Because he thinks he looks too pink.

172
00:11:27,598 --> 00:11:30,965
-What are you guys out doing today?
-We're not out.

173
00:11:32,603 --> 00:11:35,538
We're two heterosexual guys
hanging with the son...

174
00:11:35,773 --> 00:11:40,301
...of our other heterosexual friend,
doing the usual straight-guy stuff.

175
00:11:41,378 --> 00:11:42,606
You done?

176
00:11:43,814 --> 00:11:44,838
There's our stop.

177
00:11:45,616 --> 00:11:48,210
Get out of here!
This is our stop.

178
00:11:48,452 --> 00:11:50,317
You guys live around here too?

179
00:11:50,654 --> 00:11:53,452
We live in the building
by the sidewalk.

180
00:11:55,793 --> 00:11:57,192
You know it?

181
00:11:58,495 --> 00:12:02,556
Since we're neighbors, what do you say
we get together for a drink?

182
00:12:07,504 --> 00:12:09,699
So you want to go to Markel's?

183
00:12:10,641 --> 00:12:12,165
Sure, they love us over there.

184
00:12:12,810 --> 00:12:14,072
Where's your baby?

185
00:12:20,089 --> 00:12:22,216
Ben! Ben!

186
00:12:22,691 --> 00:12:26,149
That's good. Maybe he'll
hear you and pull the cord!

187
00:12:26,395 --> 00:12:27,862
Stop the bus!

188
00:12:36,972 --> 00:12:39,372
Are you sure he didn't break it?
It's really hurt.

189
00:12:39,574 --> 00:12:42,737
No, it's just a good bone bruise.

190
00:12:43,645 --> 00:12:47,513
And right here is
the puncture wound from your ring.

191
00:12:48,550 --> 00:12:51,212
-I'm really sorry.
-It's okay.

192
00:12:51,420 --> 00:12:52,717
Sorry.

193
00:12:53,221 --> 00:12:56,679
Sorry! I got my S's back!

194
00:12:57,392 --> 00:13:00,020
Which we can celebrate later.

195
00:13:00,662 --> 00:13:02,721
Celebrate. Celebrate....

196
00:13:03,865 --> 00:13:05,696
He was a double, double

197
00:13:05,901 --> 00:13:08,836
Double-jointed boy

198
00:13:10,572 --> 00:13:14,531
So are you the
professional guitar player?

199
00:13:15,077 --> 00:13:16,601
Yeah, I'm Stephanie.

200
00:13:17,279 --> 00:13:21,113
Right. My name was on there,
but now it just says carrot cake.

201
00:13:23,852 --> 00:13:26,514
So how many chords do you know?

202
00:13:27,189 --> 00:13:29,555
-All of them.
-So you know D?

203
00:13:31,693 --> 00:13:32,853
Do you know A-minor?

204
00:13:35,964 --> 00:13:38,524
Do you know how to go
from D to A-minor?

205
00:13:42,871 --> 00:13:45,704
So does your guitar have a strap?

206
00:13:48,777 --> 00:13:49,903
Mine does.

207
00:13:53,715 --> 00:13:55,876
Stephanie knows all the chords

208
00:13:58,487 --> 00:14:00,284
Come on! Pick up, pick up!

209
00:14:01,990 --> 00:14:03,617
Transit Authority?

210
00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:06,087
I'm doing research for a book.

211
00:14:06,294 --> 00:14:10,924
I was wondering what somebody might do
if they left a baby on a city bus.

212
00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:14,929
Yes, I realize that would be
a stupid character.

213
00:14:15,137 --> 00:14:17,765
Here's the deal:
We lost a car seat on a bus.

214
00:14:17,973 --> 00:14:21,409
It's white plastic and
it fits onto a stroller.

215
00:14:21,610 --> 00:14:23,441
And there was a baby in it.

216
00:14:24,813 --> 00:14:26,075
He wants to talk to you.

217
00:14:28,083 --> 00:14:31,416
Everybody, let's give a warm
Central Perk welcome to

218
00:14:31,620 --> 00:14:34,453
Terry's a jerk
And he won't let me work

219
00:14:34,656 --> 00:14:36,590
And I hate Central Perk

220
00:14:41,263 --> 00:14:43,697
To Stephanie Schiffer!

221
00:14:48,804 --> 00:14:53,264
I'd like to start with a song I wrote
for the first man I ever loved.

222
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:57,771
Zachary

223
00:14:58,346 --> 00:15:01,144
Are all invited to bite me

224
00:15:10,625 --> 00:15:13,958
We're the guys that called
about the baby! Is he here?!

225
00:15:14,830 --> 00:15:16,388
He's here.

226
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:20,558
I assume one of you is the father.

227
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:22,303
-That's me.
-I'm him.

228
00:15:24,906 --> 00:15:29,138
Actually, we're both the father.

229
00:15:38,053 --> 00:15:40,521
Oh, Ben! Hey, buddy.

230
00:15:46,928 --> 00:15:49,396
Please tell me you know
which one is our baby.

231
00:15:51,032 --> 00:15:54,001
That one has ducks on his T-shirt
and this one has clowns.

232
00:15:54,202 --> 00:15:56,261
And Ben was definitely wearing ducks.

233
00:15:56,505 --> 00:15:58,166
Or clowns.

234
00:16:00,008 --> 00:16:04,377
That one's Ben! Remember he had
that cute little mole by his mouth!

235
00:16:04,846 --> 00:16:07,508
Hey, Ben! Remember us?

236
00:16:08,283 --> 00:16:10,251
Okay, the mole came off.

237
00:16:11,586 --> 00:16:13,679
What are we gonna do?

238
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:16,721
We'll flip for it.
Ducks or clowns.

239
00:16:16,925 --> 00:16:19,052
-Flip for the baby?
-You got a better idea?

240
00:16:19,361 --> 00:16:21,261
All right, call it in the air.

241
00:16:22,764 --> 00:16:23,856
Heads.

242
00:16:24,065 --> 00:16:25,293
Heads, it is.

243
00:16:28,303 --> 00:16:31,101
We have to assign heads to something!

244
00:16:32,207 --> 00:16:33,572
Right!

245
00:16:36,311 --> 00:16:40,042
Ducks is heads
because ducks have heads.

246
00:16:44,619 --> 00:16:47,952
What kind of scary-ass clowns
came to your birthday?

247
00:17:25,963 --> 00:17:30,332
Just call me angel
Of the morning, angel

248
00:17:30,568 --> 00:17:35,301
Just touch my cheek
Before you leave me, baby

249
00:17:35,506 --> 00:17:38,634
Just call me angel
Of the morning, angel

250
00:17:40,311 --> 00:17:43,439
Then slowly turn away

251
00:17:45,182 --> 00:17:48,583
I won't beg you to stay

252
00:17:49,253 --> 00:17:51,687
With me

253
00:19:46,666 --> 00:19:49,362
Here. I thought you might be cold.

254
00:19:49,568 --> 00:19:50,796
Thank you.

255
00:19:58,344 --> 00:20:00,141
Look at you!
You did pretty well.

256
00:20:00,980 --> 00:20:03,574
$8. 27.

257
00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:06,483
But not really, because
I put in the first two.

258
00:20:07,887 --> 00:20:12,085
Just to get the ball rolling
and to make myself feel better.

259
00:20:12,658 --> 00:20:13,750
Do you?

260
00:20:15,695 --> 00:20:19,392
You know, this whole playing
for money thing is so not good for me.

261
00:20:20,499 --> 00:20:23,593
I don't know, when l
sang "Su-su-suicide"...

262
00:20:25,004 --> 00:20:28,565
... I got, like, $ 1. 75.

263
00:20:29,041 --> 00:20:30,872
But then "Smelly Cat"?

264
00:20:32,745 --> 00:20:35,612
I got 25 cents and a condom.

265
00:20:37,116 --> 00:20:40,847
So, you know, now I just feel
really bad for "Smelly Cat."

266
00:20:43,456 --> 00:20:47,552
Honey, I don't think
everybody gets "Smelly Cat."

267
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:52,697
I mean, if all you've ever actually
had are healthy pets, then whoosh!

268
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:57,132
But it's not even that, you know?

269
00:20:57,370 --> 00:21:00,203
I used to do my songs
because it made me happy.

270
00:21:00,406 --> 00:21:04,308
Now it's just all
about the money, you know?

271
00:21:06,979 --> 00:21:09,140
Well, people missed you in there.

272
00:21:09,415 --> 00:21:12,543
In fact, there was actually
a request for "Smelly Cat."

273
00:21:12,952 --> 00:21:14,419
Really? From who?

274
00:21:14,987 --> 00:21:16,249
Well, me.

275
00:21:17,990 --> 00:21:22,120
And I know it's not your big
money song, but it's my favorite.

276
00:21:25,998 --> 00:21:29,832
Did I accidentally drop
a condom in your case?

277
00:21:33,606 --> 00:21:35,733
It's kind of an emergency.

278
00:21:36,976 --> 00:21:38,443
-Here you go.
-Thanks a lot.

279
00:21:38,677 --> 00:21:40,907
Hey, Christine! I got it!

280
00:21:47,186 --> 00:21:50,087
I want to thank you
for being there for me.

281
00:21:50,289 --> 00:21:52,621
And I'm sorry
I almost broke your hand.

282
00:21:52,825 --> 00:21:56,591
That's okay.
I'm sorry I poisoned you.

283
00:21:57,596 --> 00:22:00,793
Remember the time I jammed
that pencil into your hand?

284
00:22:01,167 --> 00:22:05,365
Remember it? What do
you think this is, a freckle?

285
00:22:06,439 --> 00:22:10,205
What about the time I hit you
in the face with Sylvian's pumpkin?

286
00:22:10,476 --> 00:22:13,001
Remember when I stuck
that broom in your spokes...

287
00:22:13,279 --> 00:22:15,509
...and you hit your head on the curb?

288
00:22:17,183 --> 00:22:19,515
But I remember
people telling me about it.

289
00:22:21,353 --> 00:22:23,344
I hope Ben has a little sister.

290
00:22:25,157 --> 00:22:27,125
And I hope she can kick his ass.

291
00:22:28,694 --> 00:22:30,525
I'm gonna get a new Band-Aid.

292
00:22:31,530 --> 00:22:34,397
How about the time I cut
the legs off your Malibu Ken?

293
00:22:35,201 --> 00:22:36,498
That was you?

294
00:22:39,071 --> 00:22:42,165
They were infected.
He wouldn't have made it.

295
00:22:46,312 --> 00:22:47,677
My little nephew.

296
00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:49,541
Come here, little one!

297
00:22:50,349 --> 00:22:54,308
There's my little baby, Ben!

298
00:22:58,257 --> 00:23:00,589
Hey, he's not crying!

299
00:23:04,396 --> 00:23:06,830
Hey, he's not crying!

300
00:23:12,838 --> 00:23:14,931
There's still pie!

301
00:23:15,875 --> 00:23:18,105
I'm here. I'm here.

302
00:23:18,844 --> 00:23:20,835
How's my little boy?

303
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:25,410
You want Daddy to change
your diaper? I know, I know.

304
00:23:26,285 --> 00:23:30,517
Did you have fun with Uncle Joey
and Uncle Chandler today?

305
00:23:31,090 --> 00:23:33,558
He rode the bus today.

306
00:23:37,229 --> 00:23:39,959
Big boy riding the bus

307
00:23:40,900 --> 00:23:42,697
Hey, I have a question.

308
00:23:45,271 --> 00:23:48,297
How come it says,
"Property of Human Services"?

309
00:23:53,312 --> 00:23:55,803
You are gonna love this.

310
00:23:56,649 --> 00:23:58,139
Can you hold Ben for a sec?

311
00:23:59,051 --> 00:23:59,983
Come here. Come here.

312
00:24:00,252 --> 00:24:03,312
Stay back! I've got kiwi!
Run, Joey, run!

313
00:24:09,061 --> 00:24:12,394
Smelly cat, smelly cat

314
00:24:12,631 --> 00:24:14,724
What are they feeding you?

315
00:24:15,534 --> 00:24:16,523
No, no. I'm sorry, it's:

316
00:24:16,735 --> 00:24:19,898
Smelly cat, smelly cat

317
00:24:24,310 --> 00:24:28,007
Smelly cat, smelly cat

318
00:24:28,647 --> 00:24:29,671
Better!

319
00:24:29,882 --> 00:24:30,974
Much better. Good.

320
00:24:31,183 --> 00:24:33,845
Don't feel bad,
because it's a hard song.

321
00:24:36,088 --> 00:24:38,488
-You want to try it again?
-From the top?

322
00:24:38,691 --> 00:24:41,319
There is no "top," all right?

323
00:24:41,994 --> 00:24:44,087
That's the beauty of "Smelly Cat."

324
00:24:47,366 --> 00:24:49,231
Why don't you just follow me.

325
00:24:50,402 --> 00:24:53,997
Smelly cat, smelly cat

326
00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:57,038
What are they feeding you?

327
00:24:57,610 --> 00:25:00,738
Smelly cat, smelly cat

328
00:25:00,946 --> 00:25:04,040
It's not your fault

329
00:25:04,850 --> 00:25:07,182
That's too much. Sorry.